Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
