break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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