areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
are you so shy because you have an std?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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