So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Terrible idea I love it
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize