Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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