Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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