yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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