Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize