At least make sure they are 18
Why
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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