I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
As shirtless as possible
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
The feeling are messing with the penis
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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