just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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