we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Sacagawea was the original milf.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
