Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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