you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
