I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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