Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
