Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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