Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
