How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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