Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
