Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize