were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
