3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
