Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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