I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
