Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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