Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
They are going to name an STD after you.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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