He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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