I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
