When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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