3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
