I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
