Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
