do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize