Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
