dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
