hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
