I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
