sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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