i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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