69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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