He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Someone shattered a urinal.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
