Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize