smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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