just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
