Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
