I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
