Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize