Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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