So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
